What’s the Worst Place for a Phone Call?

Mobile phones give us tremendous freedom. No more waiting by the phone or frantically leaving messages on somebody’s answering machine¹. No more waiting in line for a pay phone²…only to discover you’re out of coins and nobody has change for a dollar. No more slogging along the side of a highway in the rain, looking for a callbox³. No more being chained to your desk.

Of course, being able to take calls anywhere has some drawbacks. Folks (including clients, bosses and nagging relatives) now often expect 24-7 availability.

And then there are those folks who are willing to take calls anytime, anywhere…

Yeah…even there.

And it’s probably more common than you’d like to think.

Where do you draw the line on appropriate phone venues?

Have you ever suspected the person on the other end of the call is somewhere better left unimagined? And what do you do if you’re pretty sure they are?

Bonus question…do you ever answer the phone or make calls from places or in situations that might make others a little squeamish?

_____

Footnotes^a
BACK TO POST ¹ I know somebody out there is saying “what’s an answering machine.” And that just makes me feel old.
BACK TO POST ² Yeah, payphones. Another relic of a bygone era. My kids think they’re a myth. Along with phone that had cords.
BACK TO POST ³ I still see these occasionally. Which seems like a really good idea for any of those roads with zero cell reception and a zillion miles to civilization.

_____

BACK TO POST ^a Many thanks to TypePad versus WordPress for reminding me how to make working footnotes in a blog post. The last time I used them was in my House of Leaves post. Come to think of it, I probably used the same site to learn how to do them in the first place.

Do You Talk Back?

“You might want to look both ways before crossing the…oh man…that’s gonna stain…”
Image by dchallender (Dave Challender) on Flickr (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

You’re driving along, minding your own business (or maybe your kids’ business in the back seat as they argue over who’s taking up whose oxygen or some other obscure manifestation of sibling rivalry), when another car whips out of nowhere and cuts you off.

Or you’re watching folks on tv do something ginormously stupid.

Or maybe you’re favorite team is losing (or winning).

Do you talk back to them?

Fess up, now.

You totally yell at the tv/radio/car in front of you, don’t you?

Or maybe you mutter.

Either way, you talk to them as if they can hear you when they can’t.

I’ll admit it, I do this shamelessly.

My kids used to ask me why, pointing out that the folks in the other car/on tv couldn’t hear me. I just explained that they could hear me…in their hearts. And now, while they haven’t progressed to critiquing those in other cars, said offspring do carry on with the tv and radio.

Aaaah, the joy of passing on your heritage to your children.

What about you? Do you talk to the tv/radio/YouTube video/cars around you? What’s your explanation for why you do it?

Have a Pattycake Christmas

However you celebrate this holiday season, my family and I wish you peace, joy and love.

Here’s a little gift of giggle just for you:

 

What’s Missing from the For Dummies Collection?

You’ve almost certainly seen these books in the bookstore (yes, the mythic bookstore does still exist…but it’s sort of like tracking down Bigfoot), library or on your friend’s bookshelf. More than likely, you own or have read at least one.

I’m talking, of course, about the For Dummies series.

My personal collection includes Writing Fiction for Dummies (by Randy Ingermanson, the Snowflake guy), Piano for Dummies (because I will learn to play the piano, darnit) and Web Marketing for Dummies (which I’m pretty sure isn’t even mine because I don’t remember buying it and I’ve never opened it).

Even though that whole “For Dummies” bit never fails to make me snicker and some of the titles give me pause:

• Being a Great Dad For Dummies
• Flirting For Dummies
• Confidence for Dummies
• Building Your Own Home For Dummies

Not that any of these wouldn’t be great books. I’m sure they’re super helpful…it’s just the the idea of any of those titles.

Know what I mean?

Perusing the ginormous catalog of For Dummies titles, you might think they have a For Dummies for everything. However, I discovered they are shockingly remiss in some areas.

Mittens takes his first steps towards world domination, thanks to World Domination For Dummies.

Did you know they don’t have a World Domination For Dummies? Taking over the world is a challenging endeavor. If you want to be the next king/queen of the world, you’re gonna need all the help you can get.

Also, there’s no Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse For Dummies. Oh sure, Max Brooks has The Zombie Survival Guide and you can probably pick up quite a few good tips from a Romero flick or any of Jonathan Maberry‘s books. But wouldn’t it useful to have a survival guide with For Dummies’s trademark tips, warnings and exercises?

Neither is there a Having a Complete Meltdown For Dummies. I don’t know about you but I’ve been on the verge of more than one of these. A few tips and tricks would have helped a lot.

I am NOT sleeping. I’m just closing my eyes so I can meditate on what you said.

And what about Embarrassing Your Children For Dummies? Pretending to Not Be Asleep While Falling Asleep in Class/Church/the Big Meeting For Dummies? Getting Fit Without Having to Exercise or Stop Snarfing Contraband Twinkies Little Debbie Cakes For Dummies?

Surely there are markets for any of these and more. All we need are the books.

What about you? What title do you think really, really needs to be on the For Dummies list?

Image Attribution (In Order of Appearance):
Image via For Dummies series (fair use)

Bengal tiger out for a hunt. by Someguy of the Outerworld and Afar, on Flickr CC BY-NC 2.0

eyes closed. by Corinna A. Carlson, on Flickr CC BY-NC-SA 2.0*

Tiny Terrors

How can something so small be so horrifying?

Okay, maaaaaaybe more cute than horrifying.

Enjoy these super scary little monsters.

*

 

Now this one doesn’t have anything to do with babies but it’s a real scream. You’ll see what I mean…

 

Has the Robot Uprising Already Begun?

While we’re all getting ready for the zombie apocalypse, the robots could be plotting to take over the world.

Has it already begun?

The hilarious folks at Cracked say yes…

You’ve been warned.

What do you think? Will computers ever gain sentience? And, if they do, will it be like Terminator or will we all coexist peacefully?

Satisfying Your Creative Urges

Whether or not we consider ourselves creative types, creativity fuels our lives every day. It’s how we solve problems, from the mundane to the extraordinary. It’s how we connect to one another. It’s how we see the humor in life, especially when life is not so funny.

Our creativity is like a little kid. Like a little kid, our creativity needs care. She (yeah, my creative spirit is a girl…maybe yours is a guy or both or neither…substitute pronouns as needed) needs to be well fed and rested. She needs a little discipline so she doesn’t run out into traffic or stick a fork in the outlet. And, maybe most importantly, our creativity needs room to play.

Just remember that little kids rarely need anything elaborate to play.

 Sometimes all they need is something small.

.

Or something yummy to eat.

.

Maybe a chance to play in the dirt.

.

And get messy.

When give our creativity room to play, we fuel ourselves up. We’re ready for whatever life throws at us. We can solve problems easily and enjoy ourselves while we’re at it. We can leap tall buildings in a single bound. We can laugh in the face of danger…

No…wait…that’s a different post. And we probably shouldn’t laugh in the face of danger. Danger gets offended easily.

At any rate, when we fire up our creativity there’s (almost) nothing we can’t do.

My creativity likes to run amok in the kitchen and garden…but hates to clean up.

How do you indulge your creative inner-kid?

Image Attribution (In Order of Appearance):
Paintbrushes by John-Morgan, on Flickr CC BY 2.0
A Simpler Time by thephotographymuse, on Flickr CC BY 2.0
Strawberry face. (Sorry, i’m joking) by Martino!, on Flickr CC BY-ND 2.0
Gardening Blog Photo1 by USDAgov, on Flickr CC BY-ND 2.0
Fingerpainting 7 by timailius, on Flickr CC BY-NC 2.0
.messy. by JeMaSiDi, on Flickr CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Possibly Probably Related articles

• Thoughts on Creativity (thedailypoon.wordpress.com)
• Creativity in Everyday Life (goodlifecoaching.com)
• On Passing Along Creativity To Our Kids (labeldaddy.com)
• Cultivate Creativity in Everyday Life (scientificamerican.com)
• Creativity can be a scary word (thecre8tivenative.com)
• Keeping the Creative Juices Flowing (reviveyourcreativity.com)
• How to Cultivate Creativity and Encourage Innovation (fashionablymarketing.me)

Mad Ads: What Are Your Most and Least Favorite Commercials?

Ads are everywhere we go, online and off. Fortunately, it hasn’t yet reached Minority Report proportions…although,  it somehow feels like we’re not far off.

Sometimes these ads amuse and entertain us, even if they never sell us whatever it is they were supposed to.

Who can forget the Taco Bell chihuahuas? Although the commercials did cause some controversy, and I’m fairly sure they did nothing to increase sales, they did have that “awww” and humor factor. Especially this one:

And my personal favorite:

Although I can never remember what the heck they’re advertising, this commercial never fails to crack me up. And it’s entered our family vernacular. For example, trying to wrangle the kiddos in a grocery store can be like herding cats. Trying to get all the relatives in one place and sitting still for an annual family portrait…you get the idea. Herding cats just says it all.

***

And then there are the commercials that annoy us, tick us off or just make us go “ewwww.”

Some of my least favorite:

Pretty much any ad where the parents or the husband are morons drives me nuts. Or where women shop uncontrollably.

Even though I have an Android phone (not the same one, thankfully), this ad gives me nightmares (which I pass on to you…you’re welcome):

Ads for *ahem* intimate products of any kind. They’re just incredibly icky. Seeing people cavorting on an ad for tampons/ED medications/hemorrhoids creams do not give me the warm fuzzies about the product. They just give me uncomfortable associations to the actors…like Joey (from Friends) with the VD ads.

Do we even need to talk about the Charmin bear ads? You know the ones I mean. Especially this one:

They’ve actually given me an aversion to the product. Now, I just see the package in the store and shudder, thinking of bears and left behind bits. Definitely not what I want to be thinking about when selecting a toilet paper.

What about you? What are your most and least favorite commercials/ads? Why? Do entertaining commercials really make us want to buy the products they advertise or just leave us loving the commercial itself?

Movies You Never Knew You Always Wanted to See

Does it seem like every movie these days is a based on a video game,  tv show or a remake? Maybe a remake of a remake? They’re making movies out of board games, for goodness sake.

Maybe you’re asking yourself “so what?” Maybe you like movies based on video games, cartoons and tv shows. Hey, maybe the remakes are better than the originals. And let’s not even get started on sequels.

Either way, here’s a few movies, compliments of the comedic geniuses at CollegeHumor, you probably won’t see in the theater but wish you could.

Couldn’t get enough of Hermione? Wish you could see what she’d do after Hogwarts? Check out Dangerous Wands…

The Spoof’s on You: Favorite Parody Songs

As a kid I couldn’t get enough of Weird Al Yankovic‘s parodies on the hottest pop songs. After being bombarded with Madonna’s Like a Virgin and Michael Jackson’s Beat It on the radio and MTV, who didn’t love Al’s Like a Surgeon and Just Eat it? With YouTube, it seems like song parodies are flourishing and there are some pretty hilarious ones. Here are a few of my favorites…

*By the way, some or all of these may not be appropriate for work place viewing or younger viewers…so hide in the break room or make the kiddies go out and play*

Al Yankovic’s parody of  Chamillionaire‘s ”Ridin”